so here i am. still. first case of the flu in Harrisburg the doctor said. 2 weeks ago. not sure why it’s taking so looooong to get over this. and i don’t do well with being sick. there is way too much to do. work. kids. you get the picture. i will say that being sick has shed some light on whether i am enjoying being separated from my husband. the answer to that question is a swift NO. try taking care of yourself when you are sick. and your kids. this is why we have families. to take care of each other. families are imperfect. i get that. but they do serve a purpose. and i am missing mine. i am the bad guy in this situation. i left. swiftly. after 18 years. there was warning over the years, but when it came right down to the moment, it was brutal. because i have never been on my own. owned anything. taken care of myself. i was initially thrilled. invigorated. i am woman and hear me roar. and then things have started to go wrong. one of my break lights was out. i got sick. you get the picture. this is when the realization hit me. duh. right on cue woman with yellow flip flops and impossibly small dog. eye candy will be along soon. read my previous post people. i don’t have time to explain. so can i get back. do i want to? when i see my husband i ask him if i can have a hug. he gives me one. i don’t let go. for a long time. i forgot how nice his hugs were. maybe we don’t get back. maybe somethings cant be undone.